Birthing our Babies, Birthing Ourselves
By Katie Walsh
Even as her water broke, Nan felt the sense of anticipation. She was actually going
to HAVE this long-awaited baby. Throughout the next twelve hours, she experienced
no contractions. Her thoughts ranged from the memory of being told that she had
only a 10% chance of becoming pregnant, to that time 15 years earlier when she
suffered the Pitocin-induced abortion. She was so young, five months pregnant,
alone, with no knowledge that the abortion included going through labor. There
was no emotional support. She shuddered as the past trauma rumbled through her.
Jolted back to present time with the ringing phone, she told the nurse that she was
not ready to come to the hospital. Fear gripped her body.
It takes the whole woman to bring forth life. Her body. mind and spirit need to be
aligned. Her task is to be an open channel for the Birthing Energy – the Life Force – to
move through. Labor and delivery is a process of softening and opening to all that is
happening on every level. Any blocks in the body/mind can impede the process. They
can be created on three levels; the mental/emotional, the physical, and the spiritual.
On the mental level, thoughts or beliefs held about birth can get in the way.
If one holds the belief, “all the women in my family have C-sections,” it is almost
guaranteed that this person will have a C-section.
Emotionally, unresolved grief about a birth loss (miscarriage, abortion, stillbirth)
can stop a labor. Nan is blocked at this level.
Physically, the body can hold memories of past traumas that were never released.
Nan is blocked on this level also. Her body remembered all too well the Pitocin and it
shut down, refusing to labor. Trauma from our own births can come up during the labor
of our babies, as well as repressed sexual abuse. All of these stored memories can impede progress in labor.
Blocks on the Spiritual level are created from being disconnected from the Life
Force and our own inner guidance system.
Emma was in early labor with her first baby. She was anxious, fidgety and unable to
trust her body’s ability to birth. Moving her out into nature, she began to connect to
the earth as she walked. Feeling the warmth of the sun, listening to the gently
whispering wind, hearing the bird song, she opened to the love and safety of the
Great Mother. As she relaxed, she became sleepy. She laid down to rest and woke up
3 hours later dilated to 8 centimeters.
Pregnancy, labor and delivery are a process of opening, an opportunity to clear the
past and make way for the future. This “state of grace” is a time for personal growth and
empowerment. As we move through the blocks we cross the threshhold from our old
lives into the richness of our new lives as conscious parents.
Frantic, Nan called her Doula. Together, with visualization tools, they asked for
guidance about what was blocking the birth. The first thing that came up was the
need to know if the baby about to be birthed was the same being that had been
aborted. The answer was “No.” Calling the spirit of the aborted baby to presence, it
was discovered that there had been a contract between them – a lesson the mom was
to learn, and a lesson for the baby being. Understanding this, Nan found forgiveness
for herself and let go. Asking what else was needed, her baby responded, “Put my
crib together and find my name.” With the crib ready to go, and while paging
through the book of baby names, Nan went into a smooth and easy active labor. As
the blocks were removed and her bodymind came to alignment, she delivered
her beautiful baby girl, vaginally, six hours later.
Often, in the process of birthing our babies, we heal and birth parts of ourselves.
Katie Walsh is a local Lomi Bodyworker, Childbirth Instructor and Doula.
